My Pastor has been talking about this for a couple weeks now, and I thought I’d share his key points, as well as some of mine with you all! Enjoy!
Raise your hand if you’ve had a failed relationship. (In case you’re wondering, I have both of my hands up.) Now, raise your hand if you’ve been up at night prying your brain for answers as to why they don’t work out.
I’ve had a few serious relationships. This time last year, I was moving in with my boyfriend at the time. We had been dating for about 8 months. I was leaving our hometown to transfer to a 4 year University, and he wanted to come. Long story short, playing house wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. We hated each other with burning passions and couldn’t communicate with each other. We both had our own baggage we claimed, which in turn created certain areas of ourselves to be empty. These areas we thought each other could fill.
This was our problem. We were looking to each other to fill our needs. Which is completely unfair. How dare we put that pressure on each other, knowing that we could never fill each others loneliness, heartache, and insecurities. We would give everything to each other but it would never be enough. But why? Why were we not enough to make each other whole? It was because we didn’t let God fill us.
Let me ask you a question: Have you let God fill up? Have you let Him sufficiently heal your wounds? See we all have baggage, that’s just life. But do we let our baggage hold us down, hold us back? Do we let our baggage consume us to to the point where we ruin our relationships? I know I used to. I was looking for people to come and claim my baggage for me. To heal the hurt. Truth is, no one can. Only God can. The best part? He already knows your hurt before you even do- He’s expecting it and is more than willing to extend His grace to you and heal you…if you let Him.
First things first, you have to accept Jesus Christ in your life as your savior for this to work. Because it isn’t a matter of if He will heal you, it’s a matter of you letting him. If you have not accepted Him as your savior, all you’ll be able to hear from Him is messages of salvation. But once you accept Him, you can start listening and allowing Him to make you whole.
In fact, He even tells us that He’s going to heal us! Take Jeremiah 30 (17) ,“I will restore you to health and heal your wounds,’ declares the LORD”.
2 Peter 1 (3) states, “His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.”
Once we are sufficiently healed, we can head into relationships not needing anything. If we do not, we will suck the life out of the other person. They will be trying to make us happy but they never can. No one person can make us truly whole and happy. Instead, we can go into a relationship and be able to truly give ourselves to the other person without needing something in return. Of course, we want a relationship where the other person will give back just as much as you give. But the point is, you aren’t looking to each other to fill each other up- God has already done that. This will create honest relationships that will last.
This will also keep our focus on God. When we rely on someone else to make us whole, we begin to worship that person when we should be worshiping God. If that person were to leave us, they would take the part of us that we asked them to heal. This will rock our world. This is what happened to me time after time. This is where I spent hours on my knees in tears asking God why can’t he just make one relationship work? We would never be able to move forward.
Starting today, are you going to let Him heal you? Will you take an honest look at yourself and evaluate your relationships? Instead of looking for the one, let’s start working on being the one for someone else. Let God come into your heart and heal you. Let Him complete you.